The girl who stands alone

It´s basically always like this.
You are born to stand alone, and you can. It comes naturally. But then you get used to all the people around you, you start leaning on then, you forget what it felt like to stand only on your two feet and you dread the memory of those times.

You don´t really remember what it was like, anyway. You just imagine the solitude and it seems so scary, so empty, just you and your thoughts.

For those who haven´t yet discovered their faults and who haven´t yet dealt with them, being alone is the scariest thing. That´s when the thoughts pour in and there is nothing to block them out. You really need to give answers to your own questions.
You realize that you might any day be standing on your own two feet again, social crutches aside, and even if the thought scares you…you have to grin and bear it.

I think I´m starting to stand alone. Telling ya..it gives you one hell of a headache! and so much time with yourself that you feel like running away, until your shadow rips itself from your heels and you can breathe with ease: you´re gone! you´re not going to run into yourself for some time.

But the shadow doesn´t go away. It hides cleverly in your shoes, sleeps underneath you in your bed and pops out fresh and full of questions in the morning.

I´m thinking that people who have met themselves already are not as afraid of being alone as I sometimes am. In the traffic jams, in the hectic hours, in the moments we have no time to breathe..we all think we´re ok.

just wait until the silence sets in. that´s when you start.

When I grow up I wanna be the girl who stands alone./who can stand alone.

About Mara Ambrosie

"I contain multitudes" W. Whitman. *poză de www.cataling.blogspot.com
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One Response to The girl who stands alone

  1. Lana says:

    You’re heading to there, dearest🙂 Actually, I think that there might be a chance to already have reached that point, but not being aware of it….However….I recognize the signs…America’s “self-made man” spirit starting to be more than a stereotype…:) Enjoy it!! And…another thing that I have discovered during my traveling periods: “You can travel the world but you can’t run away from the person you are in your heart”😉 :*

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